Holding on to the Future
by bluebird24
Summary: COMPLETE. Peyton and Lucas' relationship is tested when Peyton falls seriously ill. A sequel to 'The Ghost of Christmas Goth'.
1. Chapter 1

This story takes place about 12 years after ''The Ghost of Christmas Goth'. You don't really have to read it to follow this story, but if you're bored then read it and if you got time, feel free to leave a review :)  
Anyways, this storyline came about thanks to speculation made by **goite** in one of her reviews.

I also want to make it clear that although I'm trying to make this story as real as possible, the facts may not be totally accurate. I haven't nor do I know anyone who has been through this terrible ordeal so things may not be true or accurate. All the 'facts' in the story have been researched on the web.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything OTH related.

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**Chapter 1**

Once every month she did the same test standing in front of the mirror. Alone in the bathroom, while Lucas prepared breakfast and fed their year and half year old son, she looked at herself trying to see any significant changes in her body. Nothing. Peyton raised both arms and looked again. It all appeared to look the same.

Routinely she moved onto the next step. With her left arm still in the air, her right hand first moved from top to bottom, centimeter by centimeter; then from side to side, centimeter by centimeter. Everything felt the same. Nothing new.

She moved on to her other side, repeating the same pattern. Month after month for about eleven years, Peyton had become more familiar with her body. She now knew every inch of her body well. Her left hand moved across from the center to armpit. Back at center, a little higher up, her fingers gently, but firmly, followed the same pattern – center to her right then…No that can't be right.

She started again, in the same position. This time as she moved across, her hand moved more slowly and more carefully. It still wasn't right. I couldn't be. Two, three more times, she examined her right breast and every time, she stopped at the same spot. The spot that felt different. There was something there that wasn't supposed to be.

Silent.

Still.

Numb.

Peyton Scott just stood there frozen in front mirror. The random thoughts floating in her head wouldn't let her think clearly. It took her a couple of minutes before she calmed herself. Then she quickly began to get dressed.

In a daze, Peyton hurried down the stairs. The smell of frying bacon didn't entice her appetite like it usually did every Saturday morning. The sounds of Aiden laughing while drumming his spoon against the table didn't make her smile like it usually did every morning. In fact nothing was able to process through her scared mind – other than that deadly word.

He had heard her rushing down the stairs. With a smile on his face, Lucas leaned back a bit from the stove so that he could greet his twenty-nine year old wife as she walked down the hallway. When the hallway came into his view, he noticed that she wasn't headed towards the kitchen. She was headed towards the front door with her coat in hand.

"Peyton," he called out.

No response.

"Peyton," he called again.

She moved to put her shoes on.

"Ow," Not paying attention to what his hands were doing, he burned himself on the hot frying pan. His hand shook in the air, trying to shake off the burning sensation. Quickly, he turned off the stove and set the frying pan on a cool burner. He smiled at his son and made sure he was ok for the moment before he made his way to the front door.

Her hand had just unlocked the door when she jumped. Lucas hadn't meant to scare her when he touched her shoulder but she wasn't responding to her name.

"Hey," he said gently, trying to calm her nerves.

As fast as she could, Peyton collected her thoughts. A fake smile fell across her lips.

"Where you going? Breakfast is ready,"

"Oh, I can't…I forgot I have a meeting this morning and if I don't go now I'm going to be late,"

"But it's Saturday…"

"I know…um that's why I forgot,"

"Ok…" he was skeptical but didn't question her, after all he trusted her. He could tell, though, that something was bothering her but he wasn't quite sure what it was, "Are you ok?"

"Yeah, I just don't want to be late," after a peck on the lips, Peyton was out the door.

Full of concern, Lucas watched his wife get into her car. The sound of Aiden beginning to cry in the background made him look over his shoulder towards the kitchen. For a moment he was torn. Both of the people he loved the most needed him but he had to choose. Lucas returned his gaze on to Peyton. He set his mind at ease by telling himself that he would talk to Peyton when she came home later. He sighed and closed the front door.

* * *

After putting Aiden down for the night, Lucas tiredly went back downstairs. On his way to the kitchen, he stopped in the dining room. He picked up the lone, untouched plate of food he had made for Peyton. In the kitchen, he dumped its contents into a clear Tupperware and then started to clean up the rest of the kitchen. 

It wasn't until 10pm when Lucas finally heard the unlocked front door open. He didn't move from his spot on the couch. He didn't even bother to look up from his book.

She knew her husband well and she knew that he would be upset with her for not explaining her whereabouts. She had been gone for 14 hours of the day without a single phone call home. But at that moment she selfishly didn't care.

Tired from driving around for a good part of the day, she made her way upstairs, not daring to look into the living room where his reading light was turned on, as she walked by. At the top of the stairs, Peyton saw the door to the nursery was lightly ajar, letting out a dim yellowish light that emanated from inside the room.

Standing over her son, she smiled as she watched him sleep safe and sound. A single tear from her eye slipped down her cheek as she caressed his angelic face. Lucas was a wonderful father – something she never questioned. She knew Aiden would always be in good hands.

Feeling another presence in the room, she quickly wiped her eyes. When she composed herself, she turned around and came face to face with her husband. Slowly she walked towards him. Without a word, her arms wrapped themselves around him as she leaned on him for a moment. Peyton didn't feel his arms around her – not that she expected them too. Instead she heard him sigh and before he could move, she placed a kiss on his cheek and then walked out the door.

Alone again in his son's room, Lucas tucked him back in and adjusted the baby monitor. He pulled the door closed behind him as he entered the darkened hallway. Slowly he made his way to the adjacent bedroom where he flicked on the lights. He had expected to see his wife on her side of their double bed but she wasn't in the room.

On the couch, Peyton sat alone, waiting for her husband to check on her. Hugging her knees into her chest, she finally saw him enter the room and sat down. The distance he left between them indicated that he wasn't too pleased with her. The long silence between them confirmed it.

"I know you're upset," she finally said.

"I'm not upset," he denied in a tone that he rarely used with her.

The last thing she needed was an angry husband to deal with. With all of the thoughts of what she had discovered earlier that morning and all of the negative thoughts in her mind, she just couldn't handle anything else.

"Don't be mad, please," her voice quivered.

"Peyt," he finally looked at her. She looked tired and scared, causing his anger to suddenly disappear. "Hey," he moved closer. "I'm not mad," he said more gently, "I'm just worried…I mean you were acting weird this morning, then you were gone for the whole day with no explanation…you didn't even bother to call,"

"I know, I'm sorry,"

He leaned over and placed a kiss on her hand then with his hand he held hers. "If there was something wrong, you'd tell me right?"

Peyton didn't answer. Instead she down, like she always did when she wanted to avoid something.

"Peyt?"

Finally she nodded her head, "Yeah, I will,"

"So, how was your meeting?"

Tears welled in her eyes.

* * *

**FLASHBACK**

_She was talking to a nurse at the information desk of Tree Hill General when she heard her name being called. _

"_Peyton?"_

_The curly blonde turned around and looked like a child caught with her hand in the cookie jar. _

"_I thought that was you," Lauren said before noticing the scared look on her friend's face. "Is everything alright?"_

"_Umm, yeah," Peyton stammered._

_Lauren smiled at Peyton warmly. Not only was Lauren a nurse at the hospital, but she was also Jake's wife. Along with Jenny, they were also raising a one year old Jacob Jagielski Jr. _

"_Ok," Lauren respected Peyton's privacy and didn't want to pry any further, "Well, if you need anything just let me know or Nurse Gellar," Lauren motioned towards the lady behind the desk, "will be more than happy to help,"_

_Peyton nodded, "Thanks,"_

_After a short pause, Lauren was about to turn around when Peyton spoke up. _

"_Um, actually, Lauren? Could I…can I talk to you for a minute?"_

"_Sure," _

_After waiting for a couple of hours, Lauren escorted Peyton into a room in the oncology ward of the hospital. Normally it would have taken weeks to get an appointment at that hospital, but lucky for Peyton, Lauren worked in the oncology ward. Lauren was able to squeeze Peyton in during her lunch break. In a private bathroom, Peyton washed off her deodorant and removed her t-shirt. Once she put on her gown, she stepped out of the room and followed Lauren to a larger room. In the middle of the room was a large contraption that Peyton was familiar with. It was a special X-ray machine used to create a mammogram. _

_Betty, the technician, welcomed Peyton back. She not only knew Peyton from previous visits but she also knew Peyton from when Ellie was a patient years ago. Betty positioned Peyton in front of the machine. Having gone through the simple but uncomfortable procedure before, Peyton waited for the two plastic plates to compress her right breast. She didn't feel the X-rays penetrating, but she knew they were entering her body once the picture was taken. Then finally, the plates released her, leaving her area a bit sore. The soreness then seemed to be passed on to her left breast as it was then compressed by the two plates. _

_After the procedure was completed, Peyton was escorted into another room where Lauren was waiting. The two women sat in the room while they waited for a radiologist to look over the pictures. _

"_How you holding up?" Lauren asked._

_Peyton shrugged, "I don't know. I mean I've done this like a dozen times before but today…it's just different,"_

_Lauren nodded understanding. In the previous time, Peyton was pretty sure that the tests would be negative. Today, on the other hand, Peyton knew that there was something there._

"_Do you have any questions?"_

"_Is it possible to know now?"_

_Lauren sighed, "I'm sorry. You still have to wait until your family doctor sees the results," _

"_But if the radiologist knows now, why can't they just tell me?" Peyton started to get frustrated, "I mean if it is…if it is…" she couldn't say the word, "Well, shouldn't I start treatment right away?"_

_Lauren placed her hand over Peyton's. Lauren had waited with patients several times before and always knew what to say. She comforted them the way she was trained in nursing school. But this was different. This time it was a friend. All the training and experiences in the world couldn't prepare her for this. Comforting a stranger was much easier that comforting someone dear to you. Nonetheless, Lauren tried her best._

"_Slow down…don't jump to conclusions. It could be nothing serious. If I could find out the results for you, I would. But the hospital has strict policies about it. They only release the results to your doctor,"_

_As frustrated as she was, she didn't want to take it out on Lauren, "Thanks, Lauren. I really do appreciate all you have done for me. Having you here right now helps a lot,"_

_Lauren smiled, "I'm glad that I could be here for you. You shouldn't go through this alone. Do you want me to call Lucas to pick you up?"_

_Peyton immediately shook her head, "He doesn't know,"_

**END FLASHBACK

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"So how was your meeting?" Lucas asked.

Peyton looked away as tears welled in her eyes. "It didn't go as well I hoped," she said, somewhat truthfully.

"I'm sorry,"

"Yeah, me too,"

"Hey, it's going to be ok, Peyt. It was only a meeting, right?"

"Yeah,"

A tired yawn escaped from his lips, "Well, I think I'm going to head to bed,"

"Lucas?" she called to him softly.

"Yeah?"

"Could you just maybe stay here with me for a bit and hold me?"

Without hesitation Lucas nodded and laid down with his head resting on the opposite end to where she was sitting. "Yeah, come here,"

She crawled over the cushions and laid down beside him. His arms wrapped around her slim body.

"I love you, Luke,"

He placed a kiss atop her head, "I love you, too,"

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**A/N: ** Most of the information used in this story will come from breastcancer . org. For more information please visit their site.. 


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks for the reviews. I was going to hold on to this chapter a bit longer to explain some cancer facts in more detail but right now I just don't have much time and I want to get this story moving along. I've got each chapter outlined now and now I just have to write them :) But if there is anything that you want to see in this story, let me know. Anyways, hope you like this chapter and the rest of the story.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything OTH related

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**Chapter 2**

"Peyton!" Lucas yelled form the bottom of the steps, "They're here!"

"I'll be right down!" she replied from somewhere in the bedroom.

Lucas opened the front door of the house. Holding Aiden in his arms, they watched as Jake, Lauren and Jenny all got out of the car. Aiden pointed at the familiar visitors as Lauren crawled into the back seat of the car to get Jacob out of the car seat while Jake and Jenny disappeared behind the car. Lucas smiled at the happy family of four. He remembered the day Jake and Lauren had met.

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**FLASHBACK**

_Lucas uneasily propped himself up in the hospital bed trying to get comfortable on the hard mattress. _

"_Careful, man," Jake said from the chair that was beside bed, "You don't want to break your other arm,"_

_Jake had returned to Tree Hill about eight years ago with sole custody of Jenny from Nikki. It had taken him a while to find his daughter but once he did, the court proceedings went quickly in his favor. Nikki had been charged with perjury and resisting arrest._

"_Funny," Lucas replied bitterly. _

_They had been down at the Rivercourt playing a game of pick up when Lucas slipped awkwardly and fell on his arm. _

"_Did you call Peyton?" Lucas asked._

"_Yeah, she's on her way," _

"_Dude, I told you to tell her not to come down. You know she hates hospitals,"_

_Jake shrugged and joked, "I tried but I guess she just loves you more,"_

_Right on cue, the door to the room swung open and Peyton briskly walked over to Lucas's side. The worried look on her face disappeared when she finally saw with her own eyes that he was ok. _

"_Hey," she kissed his forehead, "How's the arm?"_

"_Better now that you're here,"_

_Jake groaned as he stood up. If things were going to get lovey-dovey between the two, he didn't want to be in the room. "I'm gonna get a soda or something. You guys want anything?"_

_Lucas and Peyton shook their heads 'no'. _

"_Hey, Jake. Thanks for taking care of him," Peyton said. _

"_No problem, I'm used to taking care of babies," he winked and walked out of the room. _

_Jake walked down a random hall, trying to find a vending machine or the cafeteria. He quietly hummed an old tune as he walked down the empty hallway. Nearing the end of the hallway, Jake slowed his pace down as he decided which way to turn – left or right. As he looked to the left, he felt someone walk right into him. _

_Instinctively, he grabbed the women's shoulders gently to steady her, "Oh, I'm sorry. Are you alright?"_

"_Yeah, I'm fine," the women in purple scrubs replied. "I just wasn't paying attention,"_

_Jake smiled at the brunette as their eyes locked. She caught his charming gaze. Slowly his hands released her. When she couldn't feel his hands on her she suddenly remembered that she was in a hurry. Quickly and somewhat nervously she bent down to pick up the files she had dropped. _

"_Let me help you with that," Jake knelt down and helped gathered the manila folders. _

"_Thank you," she replied politely. _

"_My name's Jake, by the way," he handed a couple of folders to her._

"_Nice to meet you, Jake. I'm Lauren,"_

**END FLASHBACK

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"You haven't told Jake anything have you?" Peyton asked as Lauren drove them to Tree Hill Memorial.

Lauren shook her head, "I know you probably wouldn't have told me if I hadn't seen you at the hospital and since you haven't told Lucas about it…I figured you weren't ready to tell anyone yet,"

"Thanks," she replied quietly, "and thanks for being there with me for all those tests and for today. I really appreciate it,"

"Peyton, you don't have to thank me. We're friends and I'm going to be here for you. We're all her for you…Lucas, Jake, Rachel, Brooke and Haley,"

"I know…but I just don't want to scare anyone. I mean it might be nothing, right?"

Lauren gave Peyton a hopeful smile and nodded.

"Besides, I want to talk to Lucas first before I do anyone else. He should be the first to know,"

* * *

"So you and Peyton getting much sleep lately?" yawned Jake, "Cause with Jacob crying all night, I'm lucky if I get an hour in. Seriously man, I don't remember Jenny fussing so much," 

While the girls went 'shopping' for the day, the men stayed home and watched the kids. Lucas and Jake were outside at the BBQ grilling hamburgers and hot dogs for lunch. Jenny was in the house watching TV and the two toddlers.

Lucas laughed, "Nah, Aiden sleeps right through the night. He must get it from Peyton. They both love their sleep…except for the past couple of weeks," his voice trailed off.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm not sure," Lucas flipped over a hamburger on grill. He watched the flames erupt momentarily as the juices and oils from the meat dripped down. "It's just that Peyton hasn't been sleeping much the past couple of weeks…and when she doesn't sleep, I can't sleep,"

"Is everything ok with you guys?"

"Yeah, I mean as far as I can tell it is," Lucas stared off and thought for a moment, "You know it all started two Saturdays ago when she was late for a meeting,"

"A meeting on a Saturday?" Jake questioned.

"Yeah, that's what I said…but I trust her. It's not like her to lie, you know,"

His long time friend agreed, "Have you talked to her about it since?"

Lucas shook his head.

"Maybe it's nothing. She hasn't been acting weird still has she?"

"Besides not sleeping…no. She goes to her regular meetings as usual; she comes home, takes care of Aiden, cooks…"

"Well, she and Lauren have been spending more time together lately. Do you want me to talk to her to see if anything's up?"

The last thing he wanted to do was to snoop behind his wife's back, but he had to know if she was ok or not. "Yeah, I just need to know if Peyton's ok,"

"Hey, maybe it really was just a meeting that sucked but she's over it now," Jake tried comfort his friend.

"Yeah, I hope so,"

* * *

"Hi, Peyton," Dr. Shaw greeted as she closed the door for some privacy. She took a seat behind her desk. 

"Hi, Dr. Shaw," Peyton replied politely, "This is my friend, Lauren,"

"Nice to meet you, Lauren,' Dr. Shaw warmly welcomed. She then turned her attention back to Peyton, "I received all of the tests that you did last week and reviewed each test carefully,"

Peyton's hands gripped the arms of the chairs so tightly that her knuckles turned white. Her heart beat faster and faster as each second past, waiting for the results of the test. Although Lauren had placed her hand on top of Peyton's to offer some support, it still didn't calm her nerves or offer any comfort.

She kept her eyes on Dr. Shaw's face and saw the sudden change in her face as she started to reveal the results. Her face was no longer warm and happy. Although the doctor tried to remain optimistic, the solemn look in her eyes gave it away.

"The pathology report indicated that the tumor found in your right breast is cancerous…"

Dr. Shaw continued explaining each test result but Peyton didn't hear a single thing after she heard 'cancerous'. She couldn't believe what she had heard. The chances of her inheriting the cancerous gene was 10 - one in ten chances. The odds were low but not low enough. Peyton had inherited the aggressive gene from Ellie.

"What stage is it?" Peyton heard Lauren ask.

"It's in early stage II," Dr. Shaw replied seriously.

Stage II meant that the cancer had already spread to her lymph nodes.

"The good news," Dr. Shaw continued, "is that your pathology report indicates that the cancer cell has not spread into the blood stream. I know this is a lot for you to handle, Peyton, but given your genetic history, I would like to start treatment as soon as possible. The best option is to schedule in for radiation and chemotherapy,"

"Both?" Peyton was surprised.

Dr. Shaw nodded, "Radiation treats the cancer locally while chemo attacks the cancer as a whole body – it's also as precaution in case cancer cells manage to find a way you're your bloodstream. Using both treatments will also have a greater impact on the cancer,"

"So if I do the treatment, it'll be in remission?"

"Best case scenario, yes…if not, then we'll do another round and increase the strength,"

"Exactly how many rounds are we talking about?"

"To be honest, there is no answer right now. Each cancer case is different. Some respond well to treatment and others require more intense therapy. The important thing to remember is that it was detected early. This greatly increases your odds,"

Odds. Chances. Probabilities. Everything right now was just a number game. Peyton's life was now based on statistics and knowing that didn't comfort her at all.

* * *

Groggily, with sleep still in his eyes, Lucas carefully made his way down the wooden stairs. He squinted at the bright light that came from the room down the hall. Slowly, his eyes adjusted to the lit environment and finally focused on his wife. Her back was to him as she was sitting at the dining room table in front of piles of papers and a calculator. Peyton was oblivious to his presence and continued to punch away at the calculator, only stopping to jot down a few numbers. 

"Peyton," Lucas finally said.

She turned around and flashed him a quick smile, "Hey,"

"What are you doing? It's 4 in the morning," he peered over her shoulder and saw that she was going over their ledger.

"Yeah, I couldn't sleep," she replied as she went back to work.

"So you decided to go over our budget?"

Peyton shrugged, "It's like counting sheep, I guess,"

Lucas sighed. He couldn't ignore his intuition anymore, something was definitely going on with Peyton. Kneeling down beside her, Lucas then carefully pushed her chair out and turned it to face him. With nothing but concern in his face he asked, "What's really going on here, Peyt?"

"I..." she stammered, "I...I think we should move,"

"Move?"

She nodded her head.

Lucas contemplated for a moment then he couldn't beleive it. But it would explain her unusal behavior, her meeting Lauren for lunch at the hospital, her going over their budget and the sudden talk about moving. The more his thought about, the bigger his grin got, "Peyton, we don't have to move. Our house is big enough for another..."

"No, I mean we need a smaller place," she said quietly, "We'll have a smaller mortgage to pay off and we'll save on hydro, gas..."

Confusion took over him, "Money isn't a problem. I mean we both make enough. I mean maybe it wasn't expected but we'll manage. We always do," he smiled, "We can just turn the guest room into another nursery..."

"Lucas, I'm not..."

He gently placed his hand over her lower abdomen, not hearing what she was saying, "This is so great! I can't believe we're have another one on the way already,"

When the shock wore off, Peyton harshly pulled his hand off her and abruptly stood up from the chair. She walked to the other side of the room and leaned on the buffet table for support. Her eyes were squeezed tight, trying to hold it all in.

"Peyton...I don't understand. I thought you'd be happy about being pregnant,"

"Lucas, stop, please," she said softly.

"I mean you always said you wanted more kids,"

"I'm not pregnant!" Peyton finally yelled out. She put her hands to her face. Even her own outburst surprised her but she couldn't take it anymore. She did want to have more kids with Lucas. They had also wanted to adopt. They had a plan for their lives that saw them growing old together. But all of that felt like it was slowly slipping away.

Lucas saw her shoulder begin to shake as she started to cry. He quickly crossed the room and put his hands on her shoulder. The instant she felt his touch, Peyton turned and buried her face into his shoulder and broke down for the first time since she found the lump in her breast.

"Hey, it's ok...shh," As he held her, the concern in him continued to grow. It was also beginning to frighten him. Pulling back a bit, he lifted her chin to face him, "Tell me what's wrong. Just talk to me, please"

"Lucas..." she couldn't help but to avoid his eyes, "I have...I have breast cancer," Her voice cracked.

Much like she was when she found out, Lucas stood in place, frozen. How? Why Peyton? What was going to happen? Unanswered questions flew through his mind and iIf it weren't for Peyton crying on his shoulder, he probably would have broken down himself but he had to remaing strong. Waking from his reverie he held her close and made up his mind. They were going to fight the horrible disease and they were going to win. He wasn't going to give up nor was he going to lose his wife, the mother of his child, so easily.

"I'm scared," she whispered through her crying.

"I know. I am too," Lucas cupped her face and placed a kiss on the center of her forehead before he rested his forehead on hers, "But we're going to get through this together. We're going to beat it. We're going to beat it,"

She had to beat it because he couldn't live his life without her.

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	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

The side effects of the radiation treatment were minimal. It had only turned her skin around her breast and armpit area read and irritated her like a sunburn. This was much tolerable than the side effects of the chemotherapy. Peyton's curly hair was beginning to thin out but she still had a fair bit left on her head. The worst part of the treatment, however, was the nausea. It usually lasted for three days after she got treatment and it kept her in bed or kneeling beside the toilet. Thankfully today was the fourth day after her second round of treatment and Peyton woke up feeling normal again.

Peyton entered the kitchen and found Aiden strapped in his high chair playing with his sippy-cup. The mother smiled at her son and placed a kiss on top of his head before making her way to his father. From behind, Peyton slipped her arms around his waist and let her head rest on his shoulder.

She knew how lucky she was to have Lucas and never took it for granted, especially not now. When she was too ill to get out of bed he took care of everything – the bills, the cleaning, the groceries, the cooking, their son and even her. When she was throwing up he would get out of bed and sit with her until everything was out of her system. Afterwards, he would carry her tired body back to bed and lie awake next to her, holding her until she fell asleep. And not once did he ever complain.

Lucas smiled as he flipped the grilled cheese over in the frying pan. "How you feeling today?"

"Much better, thanks,"

"Good. How about some lunch?"

"Lunch? I slept in that long?"

Lucas let out a chuckle, "It's ok. It's only 12:30," he turned around and put his arms around his wife, "And we both know that you've slept in past noon before,"

"I know, but I've spent the past three days in bed already. I just want to spend more time with you and Aiden," a hint of sadness lingered in her voice.

"And we will," he kissed the tip of her nose, "but today…I have a surprise for you and it's a good thing you slept in today cause you'll need your rest for today,"

"A surprise?"

"Uh-huh, but I think you should change,"

Peyton looked down at her tank-top and jeans, "What's wrong with this? I always wear this,"

Lucas smiled, "I know and you look great as always but I think you should get back into your pajamas,"

"Surprise!" 

Peyton spun around to face her surprise. Half walking and half running across the room were Brooke Davis and Rachel Gatina. After mending the fences during their senior year in high school, the two girls found a common ground, not just in picking up boys, but also in fashion design. During their first year of college they started selling their designs making enough to pay rent for an entire year. Then one night, while out a club, Brooke had a drunken revelation – 'why pay to go to school when you can make money selling clothes' – ok so maybe it wasn't exactly a revelation at the time – but it was enough to get the gears turning in Rachel's head.

Needless to say, both Rachel and Brooke dropped out of school and worked full time for their fashion label in California. Although it was Brooke who came up with the zaniest of ideas, it was Rachel who had the brains to make the plans work. Who would have thought these two would have made such a dynamic duo.

When Rachel finally let go of her death hold on Peyton, it was Brooke's turn to bear hug her long time friend.

"We missed you so much. We would have been here sooner but apparently news travels slow in California," Rachel said as she sent a death glare over at Lucas as she picked up Aiden from his chair. The little boy stared at her blazing red hair.

"Actually, I asked him not to tell you guys," Peyton admitted. "I know how big that fashion show was for your line and I didn't you guys to worry about me. Trust me, I was in good hands," she smiled at Lucas. Peyton then noticed a couple of duffle bags sitting over by the back door, "What's in the bags?"

"Tonight, P. Sawyer, we are going to have a slumber party!" Brooke said excitedly, "Hopefully Lucas did some grocery shopping,"

"Yes, Lucas got all your chocolates, ice creams, cookies and face masks," he mocked, "He got everything that was Brooke's list," Lucas picked up a bag that was sitting on the kitchen table and took out a video camera, "He even dug out the video camera. Now explain to me why you guys need this,"

"Uh-uh," Rachel said. "That's top secret,"

Peyton shrugged and walked over to him, "Sorry, honey. You'll just have to use your imagination,"

Lucas raised his eyebrows, "Don't mind if I do,"

"Oh gross," Brooke commented.

Rachel rolled her eyes, "Isn't it time for you to pick up Haley and Lauren?"

"Alright, I can take the hint…" Lucas gave Peyton a quick kiss, "Have fun tonight,"

"I will. Thank you," she replied.

* * *

Later that night, the girls were upstairs locked in the master bedroom while Lucas watched Aiden downstairs. From time to time Lucas could hear muffled laughter coming from the closed bedroom door. It pleased him to know that Peyton was laughing and enjoying herself with her best friends.

Lucas sat on the floor with his son, playing with some farm animal figurines when he heard a loud thump. A few seconds later high pitched screams and laughter followed. Lucas chuckled and shook his head. He looked at Aiden and said, "Girls…"

A loud knock on the front door made Lucas put down the plastic toy in his hand and get up. "I'll be right back, bud,"

Aiden's attention was fixated on the pink pig to acknowledge his father.

On his way to the door, Lucas began to dig for his wallet. Earlier, he had ordered a pizza for the girls and one for himself. When he opened the door, the kindness in his eyes quickly faded into a cold hard stare.

"Hi, Lucas,"

"What do you want, Dan?"

"I came by, hoping that we could talk,"

"You want to talk…to me?" he let out a cynical laugh. "I think you have the wrong house,"

Dan caught the closing door with his hand. "Just five minutes," he pleaded.

"Dada…"

Lucas turned around to see Aiden sauntering over to them. His tiny fingers pointed at the strange man at the door. A smile spread across Dan's face as he saw his grandson walking for the first time. Instinctively, Dan crouched down and encouraged the toddler over to him. The boy was just a few feet a way when Lucas quickly swooped his son up into his arms.

Disappointment spread across Dan's face just as quickly as he recomposed himself. It was a trait that he learned quickly – never letting anyone see your vulnerability. Never show your true feelings; otherwise other people will only see you as a weak man. It was something that he was taught by his own father, Royal Scott. Dan cleared his throat and stood up, straightening his jack as he did.

Unfortunately for Lucas, he had caught the look in Dan's face. Guilt started to build up inside him. Even though his relationship with his father was non-existant, Lucas still had compassion from – something he learned from his mother.

"Wait, here," Lucas finally said.

As Lucas carried his son upstairs, Dan entered the house. It was the first time Dan got to see the inside of the house since Lucas and Peyton had purchased the house together. His eyes wandered around the hallway until they settled on the hanging pictures. He saw framed pictures of Lucas and Peyton holding Aiden, a picture of Nathan and his family but the one that caught the man's attention was the photo of Lucas, Peyton, Aiden, Karen and Keith. They were a family.

Dan could feel his eyes begin to water. He let out a small sigh as he looked away. He was never a father to Lucas but it didn't mean that he didn't love him. There were circumstances in Dan's life that nobody really understood. Years ago he had chosen Deb over Karen. He had chosen to raise Nathan and not Lucas. He had chosen to be a family with Deb and Nathan – and a real family man didn't have two families.

He wiped his eyes when he heard Lucas coming down the stairs. The younger man came down and walked towards the front door. After opening it, he gestured Dan to follow him outside.

* * *

"Five minutes," Lucas said as he shut the door behind them.

Dan nodded, "I heard about Peyton. How is she doing?" His voice was sincere but it made Lucas feel on edge. In all the years he had known him, Dan was never just nice.

"She'll be fine,"

"I'm sure she will. She's a strong girl," Dan agreed.

"Ok…You can stop with the small talk. What are you really doing here?"

Dan reached into his pocket and pulled out his genuinely expensive black leather wallet. From inside he pulled out a white business card and handed it over to Lucas.

"Dr. McMurray?"

"He's the best in the field; the top practicing researcher in breast cancer. I made a few calls and he's taking a look at Peyton's case,"

Stubbornly, Lucas shook his head, "No. Dr. Shaw is a good doctor. She's treating Peyton,"

"Lucas, have you seen Peyton's recent results? There hasn't been any change," Dan pointed out, "Look, I'm not trying to replace Dr. Shaw. I just thought that Dr. McMurray could help and maybe find an alternative treatment…just talk it over with Peyton,"

"Even if we decided to, there's no way we could afford it," Lucas quietly admitted. Even with all the recalculating their budget, they were barely making ends meet now.

"I know. That's why I'm taking care of everything. No matter what you decide to do…"

"NO!" Lucas exclaimed. He couldn't help but think that there was an ulterior motive behind his generosity. "We don't need your help and we certainly don't need your money. After Peyton gets through this, we'll figure someth…"

"Lucas, you have a child and a mortgage to pay…," interrupted Dan. "Not to mention your bills and school loans. And with Peyton not being able to work now, you can't take care of your family on your paycheck alone,"

"You're loving this aren't you? I can't take care of my family financially and now I have to depend on 'daddy dearest' to help me out,"

"That's not it at all," Dan's voice was softer, "I just want to help. There's no strings attached to it. Nothing. Nobody even has to find out about it,"

"Why? Why now after all these years do you want to help me out?"

"Because I know what it's like to lose someone you love. And you shouldn't have to go through it too,"


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4 **

Dan Scott pulled up to the Rivercourt and parked is black Mercedes Benz. He smiled at the sight of the decorated Rivercourt. It was Aiden's second birthday and his proud parents were throwing him a birthday party. The picnic tables were decorated with balloons and streamers. Nearby, two portable BBQs were being fired up by Jake and Nathan. Their wives sat on the bench talking and watching their children who ran wild around the park. Lucas stood in the middle of the court running around with his son. Peyton stood on the side, laughing, with a video camera, filming her two boys.

Just as Dan turned his engine off, his cell phone rang.

"Dan Scott," he answered.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Scott,"

Dan smiled as he hoped to hear some good news. He kept his eyes on Lucas and his family. "Ah, yes. Dr. McMurray. I suspect that you have the test results back,"

Seven months ago, Dr. McMurray took on Peyton's case and had been on it ever since, "I just went over them," the doctor paused, "I'm afraid I have some bad news. Peyton doesn't seem to be responding to the treatment as well as we hoped,"

Dan's stomach turned as he looked away from his son's family, "Wha…what do you mean?"

"The cancer seems to be more aggressive than first suspected…"

"Then try something else," Dan said rather harshly.

"Mr. Scott…"

"Look, I don't care what you have to do to make her better. Just do it. I'm not paying you all this money just so my son can watch his wife…" Dan held back, "I'm sorry…I didn't mean to…"

"It's ok, Mr. Scott. I understand how difficult this is for you and your family. I assure you that we will do everything we can to help Peyton,"

"Thank you," Dan hung up his phone and let out a deep breath. He looked back up to see everyone with smiling faces. After a few moments he wiped his eyes and composed himself. He picked up the blue gift back that sat on the passenger seat and got out of the car.

* * *

"You know," Peyton said as she climbed into bed beside her husband, "I used to be a big believer in fate,"

Lucas put down his book and removed his glasses as he looked curiously at his wife, "What do you mean?"

"I used to believe that things happen for a reason," Peyton shrugged. "But I'm not so sure anymore…"

"I'm still not following,"

"Seven months ago, Dr. McMurray, a world-renowned cancer specialist, shows up in small town Tree Hill and just happens to come across my file," Peyton let out a grin.

Lucas's eyes widened. He placed a kiss on his wife's forehead, "It's fate, trust me," he quickly said as he rolled over and turned off his reading light, leaving them in complete darkness, "Good night,"

He laid back down and pulled the comforter over his shoulders, hoping his wife would follow suit. Instead he heard her chuckle as she turned her night light on, "And then," she continued, "he tells us he'll do it pro bono," she looked over at her quiet husband. "But if that's not strange enough…you suddenly start being civil to Dan…then you invite him to our son's party,"

"Nah, it's just fate," Lucas smirked, "Good night," he rolled over to his side, facing away from her.

"Lucas…" Peyton said in a stern tone, "is there something you want to tell me?"

"Mmm…not really,"

Peyton playfully smacked her husband on his shoulder.

Lucas gave up and rolled over again, revealing a rather large smile, "It took you seven months to figure it all out? You're losing your touch, Peyt,"

Peyton's mouth fell open at her husband's joking reply. She pursed her lips together and started to pinch his arms.

"Ow. Ow. Ow," Lucas laughed, "Alright…I'll tell you,"

When their laughter finally subsided, Lucas looked at his wife with a loving look. He traced her jaw line lightly with his finger tip. "I love you so much,"

"I know," she whispered, "But you could have told me,"

"I'm sorry…I don't know. I just feel…I feel like I should be the one who should be taking care of my family,"

"You have been, Luke. You take care of Aiden when I can't, you work, you cook, clean the house…and at the same time, you still find time to take care of me,"

"But it's not enough…" Deep down he still felt like he failed her; he couldn't protect his wife from the disease that was taking over her body.

"Luke, it is…you've been doing more than I could ever ask of you. Maybe I don't tell you enough…but you're an amazing father and husband. I'm so thankful that I have you in my life…And so what if we need help. I'll always love you. And maybe even more so knowing that you put your feelings aside with Dan for me. And who knows, maybe it's fate getting you and Dan to finally get along,"

Peyton gently leaned in and kissed her husband. When they pulled apart she smiled at his grinning face.

"So you're not mad that I sold our son to Dan?"

"That is so not funny, Lucas Eugene," she hit his shoulder.

Lucas laughed as he pulled his wife on top of him. Slowly and gently, he made love to his wife that night. Together they savored each moment and each second they had with each other.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5  
**

The day had been busy for Lucas, but well worth it. He had prepared a simple but romantic anniversary dinner at home for Peyton. While Peyton rested much of the day in bed, Lucas had dropped Aiden off at his mom's and then picked up the groceries he needed for the dinner he was going to prepare. Lucas had been so excited about the day that he had forgotten to pick up Peyton's favorite dessert from the café but a quick phone call to Nathan remedied the problem as the younger brother delivered the chocolate mousse cake, just as Lucas was taking the lasagna out of the oven.

The evening was perfect. The two lovers took their time, enjoying a quiet meal while they reminisced their long and sometimes complicated past. After a bit of dessert, Peyton had suddenly become tired but couldn't turn down a dance with her husband when he offered his arm. In his arms she felt safe and loved. She closed her eyes and rested her head against his chest, letting him sway her along with their song.

The flames in the candles that were lit throughout the room emitted a romantic afterglow as they danced just above the melted wax. Lucas continued to hold her against him. His eyes closed and his chin gently resting on top of the cloth cap that covered her bald head. As they danced he could feel her body leaning on him tiredly for more support and he knew that she was growing tired. Lucas pulled away, just enough to give her a quick kiss on the forehead. He gave her smile before he swiftly scooped her up into his arms and carried her over to the couch.

On the couch, they laid side by side with her head resting on his chest. Her body was tired, but she didn't want to sleep.

"What are you thinking about?" she quietly asked him.

Lucas chuckled to himself, "Do you remember the Christmas I wasn't invited to the cabin?"

Peyton was surprised and wondered why he thought about that time. But she did remember.

* * *

**Flashback**

_Nothing but a vast whiteness could be seen on the road ahead of her. The trees and roads were covered with the blustering snow. It had been snowing nonstop since early that morning and seemed to be getting worse by the minute. Lucky for that lone black Escalade driving along the unplowed road, it didn't have much further to go. Driving cautiously, it seemed to maneuver through the snow and ice covered road with ease. _

_The windshield wipers were wiping as fast and furiously as the snow fell. The road ahead of her was barely visible. The car slowed as she kept her eye out for two old lampposts that marked her final destination. It had been years since she had been to the log cabin, but she remembered the lampposts as they were the only objects that weren't made by Mother Nature. _

_It had been almost four hours since she left her home in Charlotte, N.C. when she finally spotted the lampposts. The twenty year old smiled excitedly as the black SUV safely turned between the two lampposts and headed up the curving driveway toward the two story log cabin that was tucked behind a small forest of pine trees. _

_The snow covered truck parked out in front of the cabin let Peyton Sawyer know that she wasn't the first to arrive. She was spending Christmas with Nathan and Haley. They hadn't seen each other since she moved out of Tree Hill three months ago. _

_Spending a Christmas weekend at the cabin had become a tradition for old Tree Hill gang ever since Ellie had invited them up there. But this year was different; Rachel and Brooke were spending Christmas in California; Karen and Keith were out of town; Larry was at sea; and Lucas who was now her ex, wasn't invited. So only three of them would keep the tradition and this year, it was the way Peyton wanted it.

* * *

_

**Two weeks earlier**

"_**Haley, if he shows up, then I'm leaving. I don't want him there,"**_

"**_Peyton…its tradition," Haley sighed into the phone._**

"_**Well, we're starting a new tradition – one that doesn't involve Lucas,"**_

"_**Just give him a chance,"**_

"_**Give him a chance…right…since when did you switch sides?"**_

"**_I didn't. I'm still Switzerland here…I'm neutral remember? Peyton, I still think that he's a stupid jackass, but he's been my best friend for years. I can't tell him he can't come,"_**

"_**Then, I'm sorry…I can't go,"**_

"_**Peyton, come on…"**_

"_**No, Haley. I can't. I can't see him again…ever. It just hurts too much. Why do you think I left?" Peyton paused. The last thing she wanted to do was to ruin their holidays as well, "Look, just go have fun at the cabin. My dad should be home in a couple of days anyways,"**_

"_**I thought you said your dad wasn't coming home," When Peyton didn't answer, Haley knew that Peyton was going to spend the holidays alone in a new town, "Peyt, just meet us at the cabin. I'll talk to Lucas,"**_

**End Two Weeks Earlier

* * *

**

_Blinded by the falling snow, Peyton slowly made her way to the front door as cold winds danced around her. Peyton set her small suitcase and bag of art supplies down as she stood in front of the door. Excited to see her old friends again, she knocked loudly. _

_She was busy dusting off the snow that had quickly accumulated on her when the door opened. Peyton looked up and finally saw him. Her mouth dropped in shock while her eyes blinked as she barely recognized the man standing in front of her. _

_It had been three months since she last saw him. His hair was a bit long and unkempt, like it had been in high school. A fully grown beard covered his face. From a distance she probably wouldn't have recognized him. But one look at his eyes and she knew it was him. His eyes never changed – always able to make her heart skip a beat every time she let her guard down. And for a brief moment it was. _

"_Hey," he softly greeted. Lucas suddenly saw her brow narrow at him. Immediately he knew her walls were back up. _

"_What are you doing here?" she asked bitterly. _

_He took a deep breath and was about to explain when Peyton's cell phone went off. Lucas watched the blonde fumble through her pockets for phone. Her blonde hair was longer, which now came down to her shoulders and like always, each curl was perfect but she was still the same Peyton Sawyer he had always known and had always loved. _

_The screen on her cell read "Haley Scott". With a tilt of her head and another glare at Lucas, Peyton seethed, "Excuse me, but I have a little yelling to do," _

_Peyton pushed past Lucas and let herself into the cabin. Lucas let out a sigh before bending down to pick up her belongings. _

"_Tell me exactly why you're not here so I can kick your ass," Peyton greeted Haley on the phone. _

"_Oh…he's there isn't he?" Haley bit nervously on her lip and threw a look at her husband who was driving._

"_Hmmm...what do you think? How could you not tell me, Haley?"_

"_Cause I didn't even know. I just found out," Haley tried to explain, "Lucas called Nathan the other day and told him that he was coming to Tree Hill for Christmas but since we were going to the chalet, Lucas would spend the Holidays alone,"_

"_Well what about Karen and Keith?"_

"_They went to Colorado,"_

"_Why couldn't Lucas go with them?"_

"_Umm…it was kinda for their anniversary…"_

"_So…Lucas is a big boy. I'm sure he sleep in a room by himself…"_

"_Peyton…He was going to spend Christmas alone. Nathan couldn't let him do that and honestly…I have to agree," Haley softly admitted, "Look I know things between the two of you is hard but I know you wouldn't want him spending Christmas alone either,"_

_Haley heard Peyton sigh in the phone. She knew she was right. _

"_When are you getting here?" Peyton started to give in. _

"_Nathan, where are we right now?"_

"_About two hours away," Nathan guessed. _

"_Peyt, we're about two hours away…maybe three. It's coming down pretty hard,"_

"_Yeah…you guys be careful out there," Peyton said sincerely._

"_You gonna be ok?"_

"_Yea…I think I'll just stay up here till you guys get here,"_

"_Peyton…it won't kill you to talk to him a bit,"_

"_Hey, he's here and he won't be alone for Christmas but that doesn't mean that I have to talk to him," Peyton said firmly. It wasn't that she didn't want to talk to Lucas, it was that she couldn't. Seeing him again tore at her still aching heart. It was still even painful thinking about the good memories they shared and knowing that there wouldn't be anymore. _

_Downstairs Lucas was busying cleaning out the ashes from the fireplace. He never really knew how to start a fire until Peyton taught him how on that very same fireplace. _

_Lucas smiled at the memory that had re-kindled their relationship. Since then, they had been happy for three years, but just like that it was all gone. Lucas dumped the last of the ashes in the garbage. He tried to dust off the ashes from his hands, but it only smeared the black soot. It seemed so much easier watching Peyton do it. He wiped the sweat off his brow with the back of his hand, leaving a black smudge across his forehead. _

"_What do you think you're doing?" Peyton suddenly appeared at the doorway._

"_Trying to get a fire going?" he was even questioning his own actions. _

"_No, all my stuff…" she pointed at her belongings that she didn't bring into the cabin, "you went into my car?"_

_Lucas looked over his shoulder to see Peyton standing beside her stuff. When he saw her art bag, he knew her easel and canvases weren't far behind. While she was upstairs, Lucas had gone into her rented SUV to get the rest of her stuff. _

_He shrugged and went back to tend to his ashes, "You're welcome,"_

"_Whatever…you know what? Just stay out of my stuff and out my way this week…in fact…"_

"…_just stay out of your life," Lucas finished for her. Unfortunately for him, he was all too familiar with those six words. It was actually seven words, but he omitted the expletive that she had used. They were also the last words she had said to him._

_He stood up and faced her, but kept his eyes down on the floor. "I know…and I know you don't want me here either," his voice was soft I'll stay away from you if that's what you want…but can you at least help me start the fire?"_

**End Flashback

* * *

**

"It was the worst time of my life. Letting you go was the biggest mistake of my life," he admitted, "But that night was one of my best nights in my life,"

"Yeah…well we did a lot of things that night," she remembered.

Lucas laughed. "Yeah we did…But it was also the night I decided to ask you to marry me, you know,"

Peyton smiled as she listened to his soft and soothing voice as he finished telling his side of the story.

* * *

**Flashback**

_Night had fallen and the younger Scott family still hadn't arrived. The snow outside was still blistering down. As the fire flamed from across the room, Lucas stood by the window. His head leaned against the cool glass while his eyes stared at the wooden stairs the led upstairs to where she was. He was hoping Peyton would come back down. Soon enough, Lucas heard the stairs creak and couldn't help but smile. Lucas quickly composed himself and repressed his smile as he averted his eyes out the window._

_As she made her way down the stairs, the smell of the burning wood enveloped her senses. There seemed to be something about the combination of the smell of the hickory, the sounds of the cracking wood and the sight of the glowing fire that constantly reminded her of the past. _

_When she stepped off the last step, her eyes almost immediately fell on him. The cabin was dark but the light from the fireplace casted enough light on him to illuminate his face. Peyton couldn't help but notice the difference. The scruffy beard that once covered much of his face was now gone. A part of her sensed that he had done it for her; Peyton didn't like the full-grown beard on him. She had always joked that it was like kissing a shaggy dog. Regardless of what she thought, Peyton continued to stare at him for a second longer then she wanted to. She couldn't help it. Peyton had missed him. _

_From the corner of his eyes, he watched her as she made her way to the kitchen, which was adjacent to where he was standing. Suddenly, Peyton took a deep breath, which made him smile. She had picked up on another scent – his aftershave. The masculine scent of lavender and jasmine mixed with musk and sandalwood made up his Cool Water cologne; it was also her favorite and often times it put her in a different mood. Regardless of what she was thinking, she crossed the room to the kitchen in silence. Lucas missed her dearly. _

_Peyton was curled up on the couch with her legs pulled in. A white crochet blanket covered her legs. She slowly sipped on her hot cocoa as she watched the fire. Lucas watched her from across the room. He didn't move from his post since Peyton came down from her room. The last thing he wanted to do was to frighten her but her being in the same room with him had to mean something. Either she was tired of sitting in the bedroom alone or she was ready to talk. In either case, she was there. _

_Cautiously, Lucas made his way towards the couch, "Nate called. He said the roads are closed and they're staying over night in a motel," he broke the ice as he sat down on the couch. _

_An icy glare thrown at him told him that he had sat down too close to her. Hesitantly he scooted away, giving her some space back. Satisfied with the distance, she took another sip from her mug and turned her attention back to the glowing flames. _

"_I take you're still not talking to me," _

_Silence. _

"_Well, good. Cause there's a few things I need to say. I screwed up. Simple as that and I'm sorry for everything I did and didn't do. I should have been there for you. I should have fought harder for you…I shouldn't have let you go," _

_As he spoke, he inched closer. He could see tears that she refused to let go glisten in her eyes. Peyton wrapped the blanket around her tighter as she could feel him tearing down her walls. _

"_Peyton, I want to fix this…I miss waking up next to you. I miss washing the lipstick off your coffee cup…I even miss you hitting me in your sleep. I miss you, Peyton,"_

_Lucas rolled off the couch and kneeled down in front of her. He took her hands in his. With his eyes still on hers, he brought them up to his lips and kissed them. He then placed her hands on his cleaning shaven cheek. At the risk of moving to quickly, he leaned closer until his forehead rested on hers. _

"_I'll fight forever if I have to just to get it back…tell me what I have to do to get it all back…to get you back," he whispered. _

"_No more beards," she gave in._

_Lucas nodded, "Done. What else?"_

"_Kiss me," she whispered back._

_A happy grin escaped his lip before he obeyed her. _

_He barely slept at all that night. Most of the night was spent laying by the fire in each other's arms. Occasionally they would interlock hands and play with each other's fingers. Stolen kisses were also shared just because they could. _

"_Morning," he said happily. _

"_Morning," she replied with a yawn. "How long have you been up?"_

"_All night…I was too excited too sleep,"_

"_Still?" she giggled as her hand grazed his thigh, "Even after last night?"_

_He laughed, "Hey. I'm trying to make up for lost time," he joked, "Seriously, I couldn't sleep because I was afraid that this would all just be a dream,"_

_Peyton leaned up and gave him a kiss, "It's not a dream," she assured him._

**End Flashback

* * *

**

"The moment you took me back, I knew I couldn't lose you again…" his voice trailed off. Lucas shut his eyes tight trying to fight the reality that was flooding back into their once perfect world. He began to worry when she didn't say a word. Lucas looked down at her and saw that she had fallen asleep.

Peyton's breathing was deep and regular. Her body was tired and desperately needed some rest. Along with the new cancer treatment her body was just too tired to fight the mutating cells. After carrying his wife to their bed, Lucas sat on the edge of the bed and watched her sleep peacefully. Even without her gorgeous blonde curls, she was the most beautiful person in the world.

Throughout the whole treatment, Lucas had been the strong one. Between taking care of the house, Aiden and Peyton, Lucas didn't seem to have the time to process what was really happening.

His hand caressed her cheek. He noted the dark circles under her eyes. Her skin was paler then usual. It was beginning to hit him like a ton of bricks. Lucas quickly withdrew his hand as tears began to well in his eyes. As fast as he could, without disturbing her slumber, he left the room.

* * *

Although the drive was short, he didn't remember how he got there. He just found himself standing in front of the familiar door. The porch light suddenly flickered on, startling a moth that had found a resting place on the fixture. With caution, the door slowly opened. When she finally saw who was pounding on the door so late at night, she quickly swung it open. 

"Mom…" he choked out.

Almost immediately, the six foot man collapsed into the arms of the five foot four woman, nearly knocking her over. But with a mother's strength, she remained upright, holding her son who was crying uncontrollably on her shoulder. It was the first time Lucas had finally broken down since Peyton had told him about the cancer.

Karen's tired eyes opened with worry and sadness. He continued to lean on his mother his legs began to weaken beneath him. When she couldn't hold him up any longer, she carefully slid down onto the floor beside him.

"I…I can't lose her, mom," he muffled out through his tears. "It's not fair…"

"Shhhhh…I know, I know," Karen hushed him. She gently rubbed his back, trying to console him. She wished that there was more that she could say, more that she could to help her son and daughter-in-law.

* * *

**A/N:** Alright, so this chapter ended up being a lot longer then I intended it to be. It's actually longer but I made some changes but I"m sure you guys know what's going to happen next. Hope you're still reading this fic.  



	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

They promised her no tears and they kept up their part of the bargain while they were in the room with her. It was hard keeping it all in but that's what she wanted. The only thing she wanted to see were smiling and happy faces.

Rachel, Brooke and Haley let out loud cackling laughs while Peyton laughed weakly and tiredly, but nonetheless she was laughing. Seeing Peyton smiling made a few tears fall.

"Hales," Peyton started when she saw them.

Quickly, Haley wiped them away, "They're laughing tears, I swear," her voice cracked with emotion. She tried smiling but her lips trembled. It was hard for her to keep it in. She reached out for Peyton's hand and held it.

"Come here," Peyton relented. Her voice was tired and weak.

Immediately, Haley smothered Peyton with a hug. Peyton couldn't help but smile. She then whispered a few words into Haley's ear which only caused her to cry harder. Brooke and Rachel tried to keep their emotions in check, but couldn't any longer. The two girls joined in on the group hug and let out a few tears.

"Ok, ok...you guys promised," Peyton finally said through tears of her own.

The three girls sat up with smiles on their faces. Haley reached over to the night table and passed out tissues to everyone. As their time with her ticked on, the harder it was to keep their emotions in check. Neither of them wanted to leave and neither of them wanted her to leave but the girls knew that it was almost time.

After a few more stories and many laughs, Aiden walked into the room with a smile of his own. He was now four and would be turning five in a couple of months. Seeing his mother with no hair and looking so pale and tired was no surprise to him. She had been like this for over a month now, hardly ever leaving her bed. Regardless, Aiden climbed into bed, kissed his mother's cheek and snuggled closed to his mother.

Rachel, Haley and Brooke smiled. Their time was up. It was Aiden's turn to spend some time alone with his mother. One by one they kissed Peyton's forehead and whispered their I love yous to their best friend.

"Look what I drew you mommy," the small boy held up his picture. "Daddy gave me a picture of us and the cottage, so I tried to copy it,"

"That's beautiful, honey," she placed a kiss on the top of his head, "You definitely take after me,"

"I think you draw better. I want to draw like you,"

"You will. Just keep practicing and maybe one day you'll be even better,"

Aiden smiled and nodded.

"I love you, you know that?"

"Yeah," he laughed, "I love you too, mommy,"

He leaned into Peyton and hugged her. Peyton held on to him as tight as she could. When he pulled back he looked at her. His tiny hand caressed her face.

"You look tired, mommy. Do you want to take a nap?"

"Soon, baby,"

"Can I nap with you?"

"Sure,"

Aiden lifted the covers and got in with his mom. Before settling in, he kissed his mother again. His head gently rested against her shoulder. Peyton wrapped her arms around her son.

"Can you sing me my song?"

"Of course,"

With her soft angelic voice, Peyton sang her son to sleep. As he closed his big blue eyes Peyton watched him sleep. She leaned down and placed a kiss on the top of his head. Her nose became buried in his thick bushy hair that resembled his father's unkempt high school hair. The older he got, the more he looked like his father, but deep down, Peyton knew Aiden's actions mirrored hers.

"Be good, hun. I love you," she swallowed the growing lump in her throat.

She took a deep breath and calmed herself. Softly she hummed the tune to his song as she ran her hands through his hair.

"Hey, how's my little girl," he softly interrupted.

Peyton looked up and smiled, "Hey, dad. I'm not little anymore, you know,"

"No, but you'll always be my little girl," he smiled and sat down on the bed beside his grandson. "You've got one great little boy here. I see so much of you in him,"

Peyton laughed, "I know. Scary isn't it? I don't know if Lucas can handle another teenage Sawyer on his own,"

Larry's eyes began to water.

"I'll be ok," Peyton said reaching for his hand.

"I know you'll be, pumpkin,"

"And you will be too,"

"Yeah," he tried to sound as believing as possible.

"Don't cry, daddy,"

His lips trembled. "I'm sorry...it's...it's just not fair," He had promised himself he wouldn't break down in front of her but like her friends, he couldn't help it. Larry Sawyer had already lost his wife and now he was losing his daughter and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

Larry wiped his tears with the back of his hand as he tried to collect himself. "I'm so proud of you pumpkin. I love you so much,"

"I know. I love you too," Peyton said, "But promise me you won't be angry. Lucas will need all the help he can get,"

Larry let out a smile, "You're always looking out for everyone else but yourself,"

"Somebody's had to keep you boys in line," she joked.

He let out a laugh. "Don't worry, honey. We'll be ok," Larry ran his hand through his grandson's hair. "I'll make sure of it,"

Peyton placed a kiss on her son's forehead. "I know,"

The bedroom door creaked open. Larry looked up and saw Lucas step into the room.

"Sorry, I'll come back in a few,"

"No, no...come in, Lucas. I was just about to take Aiden back to his room,"

Peyton looked down at her little boy. He was still asleep, unaware of what was going on around him. "I love you Aiden,"

Larry looked away as Peyton continued to whisper in her sleeping son's ear. When she was finished she looked up at her father. "I love you, dad,"

"I love you, too,"

Her father leaned in and placed a kiss on her forehead. They shared a small smile when he pulled back. Carefully, Larry took Aiden into his arms. He took one last look at Peyton and walked out of the room just as the tears began to slip.

"Hey," she said in a soft weak voice.

"Hey," Lucas smiled.

"Come lie with me,"

With a nod, Lucas slipped under the covers with her. Gently he snuggled close to Peyton and wrapped his arms around her and held her. Peyton's head lay nestled on his shoulder. She looked into his eyes and smiled. He leaned down and kissed her on the lips.

"I love you, you know that?" he said.

"I love you, too,"

Their eyes glistened with tears but Peyton didn't want to spend her last few moments crying. She wanted him to hold her and wanted to listen to his voice.

"Tell me a story,"

Lucas nodded. He kissed her again and cleared his throat before starting the story.

Peyton listened for as long as she could until she got tired. As she closed her eyes she felt the warmth of his lips on her forehead. His soft soothing voice continued with the story.

He fought back tears as he kept his eyes on her. Gradually her breaths became slower and shallower and every time he noticed it, he held tighter on to his wife, never wanting to let her go. Peyton's body became more and more relaxed against his. His voice began to waver. Lucas watched her. He watched her until Peyton took her last breath.

Tears poured from his eyes and streamed down his cheeks. He continued to hold her as his body trembled with silent tears. His hand caressed her face, not wanting to believe she was gone. Lucas buried his face in her neck and sobbed uncontrollably. Peyton, the love of his life was gone.

Outside in the hallway, they were all sitting on the floor. Nathan held his wife. Beside them, Jake sat with his wife, Lauren. On the other side of the narrow hallway, Rachel and Brooke sat up against the wall. Nobody had said a word since Larry took his grandson into his bedroom and shut the door behind him.

Rachel who was the closest to the door was the first to hear Lucas's muffled cries from inside the room. She shook her head, refusing to let the tears to fall. She didn't want to believe it –no one did. As they looked at Rachel, Lucas's cries became louder and soon they all knew that their best friend was gone.

She had lived a short but full life. Although she had no control over how long her life was, she did have control over the way she lived. That was something she never took for granted. With every decision she made, she changed her future and lived the way she wanted to live life. Her decisions led her to a life with Lucas and it gave her a son she loved more than anything. It was filled with love and happiness that not many people would ever experience. And if she was ever given the chance to relive her life, there wasn't a thing that she would change, no matter how short or long her life would have been. She knew, even as she took her final breath, that she was leaving with no regrets.

* * *

**Eleven Years Later **

"I am not spending another summer at that stupid cottage," a sixteen year old Aiden Scott yelled at his father.

Lucas looked at his son. He didn't recognize the sweet blonde boy he had raised for the past eleven years. The boy standing in front of him was no longer blonde and no longer sweet. He was a sixteen year old rebellious boy with dyed black hair.

"You are coming with me to that cottage," Lucas was tired of arguing, "Whether you like it or not, we are leaving tomorrow morning. So I suggest that you go up stairs and start packing,"

The Scott men stared each other down. Neither one of them seemed to waver.

"Mom is dead," Aiden hissed. He knew his father well and knew which buttons to push. "No matter how many times we go to her cottage, she's not going to be there and she's not going to be here when we come home,"

Pain flickered in Lucas's eyes. He wanted to slap some sense into that boy, but Lucas was never a violent man and he wasn't about to change that. Instead he straightened himself up and fought with the tears in his eyes. With one last look at his son, Lucas turned and walked out of the house without a word.


	7. Chapter 7

**Warning – **some drug use mentioned.

* * *

**Chapter 7  
**

**Twelve Years Earlier**

"Peyton," Dan was surprised to see his daughter-in-law at his front door.

"Hi, Mr. Scott,"

"It's good to see you. Come on in. How are you doing?"

"Good,"

She stepped into the house but didn't go any further. Her visit was going to be short.

"Look, I just wanted to let you know that I know why Lucas has let you back into his life and our son's life,"

"Peyton, it's not what you think. I really do love…"

She out her hand up, signaling for him to stop talking, "I know you do. I just wanted to say thank you,"

A small but genuine smile escaped his lips.

"Even though it took me getting sick, I'm glad you two could find a way to work it out. I know you've been trying for years. I also know that he's going to need a lot of help when I…"

"Peyton, you're not going to…"

"No," she cut him off again. "I made peace with it and I'm ok with it now. Well, not really, but I've had a good life. Luke made sure of it," she smiled. "Which is one of the reasons why I'm here. I need to ask you a couple of favors,"

"Anything,"

"No matter what happens, take care of Lucas. Make sure he's ok. Just be the father he deserves. Don't blow this opportunity because if this turns out to be some sort of scheme…."

"It's not. I promise,"

She looked at him for a second. Believing in a Dan Scott's promise was hard to do but Peyton saw something in his eyes that made her believe him. "Ok, but if you hurt him or my son, I'll haunt you for the rest of your miserable life,"

"Good too see you haven't lost your edge," he joked.

"When it comes to protecting my family…"

"You have my word Peyton," he said seriously. "I made a mistake and I know that now. It took me almost thirty years to realize that I missed out on something great. I'm not going to make that mistake again,"

Peyton accepted his answer. "There's one more thing,"

She handed Dan over a manila envelope. "It's for Aiden. There's a few things I need you to do for his sixteenth birthday,"

Dan curiously took to envelope and eyed the cryptic blonde.

* * *

**Present Day**

Aiden Lawerence Scott stormed into his bed room, slamming the door behind him. He had a tough, angry exterior that caused many people to fear him and misunderstand him. He never meant to bottle emotions up or push people away. It just felt natural to him. He was surly his mother's child.

And like his mom, deep down, he wasn't so tough. Angry, maybe; angry that his mother was taken away from him so young; angry that as he grew up, the more he unintentionally forgot what she was like and how soft and comforting her voice was when she'd to sing to him. But it wasn't so much the anger that filled him. It was the sadness and feeling of loneliness that consumed him.

Dejectedly he leaned back against it, hating himself for saying all those things about his mother to his father. He needed an escape.

It was about a month ago when Aiden was first introduced to marijuana. Ricky Jr. befriended Aiden outside the school one day and offered him a hit. Aiden was hesitant at first but once he felt the effects of the drug, he wanted more.

As he fished through his jacket pocket for the small plastic bag, he found something else. Pulling out the small glass vile, Aiden stared at it. Cocaine. Ricky Jr. had given it to him earlier that day and told him that it'd give him a stronger euphoria.

He placed the bottle on his nightstand and began rummaging through the drawer for something to cut it with. At the bottom of the drawer, he found a ruler. A sarcastic smirk fell on his face. Who would have thought that a ruler could help him draw more than one kind of straight line?

The night stand shook when he closed the drawer, causing the bottle to topple over. It rolled off the table top and on to the floor. Still in tact, it rolled under the bed.

"Damnit," he swore as he got onto his hands and knees. Blindly with his hand, he searched for the tiny vile. Deep under the bed, he found it. He was about to pull it out when his hand brushed against something else. Curiously Aiden fished the foreign object out as well.

It was an envelope. He immediately recognized it. Grandpa Scott had given it to him on his sixteenth birthday along with a basketball and a pair of Bobcats tickets. He told him that it was a special present from his mother. At the time, Aiden rolled his eyes, believing that it was some sort of scheme to get him to spend time with his father. So Aiden buried the leather ball in his closet, threw the envelope somewhere in his room and sold the basketball tickets for cash.

He never thought about those presents again until now. Curiously he ripped the envelope open and emptied the contents. It was a DVD. On the disc, written in an unfamiliar handwriting, it read. Happy 16th Birthday Aiden.

After setting up the disc in his DVD player, Adien sat down on his bed and turned on the TV. The black screen suddenly lit up. He saw himself, as a toddler running around. From what he could tell, it was the Rivercourt.

A two year old Aiden ran gleefully away from the camera and straight into his father's arms. Lucas picked up the boy in one swift scoop. He turned his son around to face the camera.

"Wave, hi to mommy," Lucas said.

"Hi, mommy!" little Aiden screamed happily.

Off screen, Peyton's voice sang, "Hey, baby. Happy Birthday,"

Suddenly, the camera shook and a close up the ground was shot. A muffled, "Thanks, Haley," was then heard. Seconds later, his mother appeared on screen beside little Adien and Lucas. The happy family smiled for the camera.

Up on her toes, she planted a kiss on Aiden's forehead and then one on Lucas's lips.

"Kissy!" Aiden said, causing the adults to laugh. He then lunged for his mother's arms. Peyton took her son into her arms. Forehead to forehead they smiled, whispering and planning something secretive. With one last nod, the two stared mischievously into the camera. An innocent Lucas leaned in and kissed his son and wife.

"Wave bye-bye," Peyton said.

Aiden waved, "Bye! We have to tickle daddy now,"

Lucas's eyes peeled open in surprise before running off from the tickling hands. Aiden shrieked in delight as he and Peyton started chasing him. And just like that the screen went black again.

Seconds later, the screen lit up again. They were no longer at the Rivercourt, but in a room somewhere in the house. Aiden couldn't believe his eyes when his smiling mother appeared front and center.

"Hey, it's me, Peyton Scott, your mom. Wow. This is weird. I didn't plan on doing this but I saw the video camera and… well I just thought…well I wanted you to see what I used to look like and what I sounded like. Just in case you forgot me,"

She paused for a moment, collecting herself before continuing on. The last thing she wanted was for her son to see her cry.

"If you're seeing this, you're sixteen now," Peyton let a proud smile show, "Happy Birthday, Aiden. I wish I could be there with you. See how you are and see how much more of a man you've become. If you're anything like your father, then I know you'll be alright. Grandma Roe did a great job raising him,"

"But if you're anything like me, then God help your father," she laughed. "Seriously though, if you're like me, you don't have to worry either because your father will take care of you, like he took care of me,"

"I guess I didn't want you to see this till you were sixteen because sixteen is a big turning point in your life. At least it was for me. Umm…you see, I lost my mom, your Grandma Sawyer when I was nine and for a long time I couldn't get over it. So on top of missing her, I was also growing up and trying to figure out who I was. And it's hard you know. I mean here you are trying to figure out who you are on the inside while still trying to fit in at school,"

"I um…your father is gonna go crazy if he finds out I told you this but I think you should know so you can learn from my mistakes,"

Aiden watched the screen intently. He noticed his mother nervously fidgeting with her hands. A habit that he apparently had inherited from her.

"When I was your age, I did a line of coke. You know I was stupid and young and I got pressured into it. To make matters worse, I started to feel like I was slipping away from everyone. I just felt alone and like I had no one to talk to. So, one night I drew some lines on a CD and as I peered down over it, I caught I glimpse of my reflection. I didn't like what I saw. I didn't like who I was becoming,"

As Peyton continued with her story, Aiden stared at his own vile of white powder. He played with the bottle in between his fingers. His lips pressed together and his eyes narrowed, refusing to cry. The lonely, confused teen momentarily stopped listening to his mother, but the important words of guidance somehow made it through.

"I realized that it didn't have to be that way. I wasn't alone. I never was. I did have people to talk to. I just wouldn't let them in..."

That was enough for him. Aiden wiped his tearstained face with his sleeves. He stopped the player and left the room, vile in hand. Moments later, the toilet flushed the contents of the vile down to the sewer system.

Aiden Lawrence Scott entered the room. He felt different from the boy who left the room minutes before. He didn't know exactly who he was yet, but he knew who he didn't want to be. Sitting comfortably again, Aiden played the rest of the video.

"Even though I'm not there with you, you'll be ok. You'll be better than ok. Aiden, you are surrounded by the best, most kind and loving people you'll ever meet. And I know that they'll take care of you. If there is anyone you need to talk to, you can talk to Uncle Nathan or Aunt Rachel. They'll give you nothing but honesty. If you need relationship advice_, stud_," She grinned. "Talk to Aunt Brooke. No scratch that. Talk to Aunt Haley or Uncle Jake, yeah, they're much better. You can talk to Aunt Brooke when you're older. Much older,"

"But if you want the ultimate advice – on anything at all – your dad is the one to go to. Peyton paused for a moment, letting smile creep onto her face as she thought about her husband. "Your father is...your father is a smart man. Now he may get all deep and philosophical on you but he'll say exactly what you want you to hear. Or make you read it from some book," she added with a smile.

"Just promise me one thing: if you ever find yourself in a difficult situation, take a step back and think…think about what you want for yourself, what you want for you future and hold on to that. No matter what you do, I'll always be proud of you Aiden, remember that. Well, I guess that's all I need to say for now. Aiden, I love you,"

"I love you so much. I wish you were here," he whispered softly, "I don't know what to do anymore. I tried so hard to be the best man I could, but I can't help but think that I failed you. I need you now more than ever,"

"Dad?"

Lucas turned around to see his son standing behind him. He quickly wiped his eyes, "Aiden. What are you doing here?"

"I um…I wanted to visit mom,"

"I didn't know you still came out here,"

Aiden just shrugged. He was here on most nights. Often, when he couldn't sleep, he'd sneak out of the house and just sit here, but his father never knew that.

"I'll um…I'll give you some time with her then," He stood up and started to walk away.

"Or you could stay,"

Lucas stopped, unsure of what he heard. He looked back and saw his son staring back at him. For the first time in a long time, Lucas didn't see the anger or bitterness in his son's eyes. He just saw his son. His little boy who needed his help.

They sat down together beside her tombstone. Aiden opened up his backpack and took out a single forget-me-not.

Lucas smiled, surprised by the gesture. "That was your mother's favorite,"

Then it suddenly donned on him. All those times he'd come to visit his wife, Lucas would always find a single forget-me-not by her tombstone. He always wondered who was leaving flowers behind for his wife and now the mystery was solved.

"Yeah, I know. I remember you telling me," Aiden explained. "I don't remember much else, though,"

"Your mother loved you so much. And had the biggest heart. Always taking care of others before herself. She was…she was a lot like you, actually,"

"Really? How?"

"Stubbornly independent and guarded but deep down, she was a good person. It took me a while to get past her icy exterior, but when I did it was worth it. You know, she was the person to go to when you had a problem,"

Aiden threw his father a peculiar look. He found it strange that his mother told him that his father was the expert in advice.

"What?"

"Nothing," Aiden decided to keep the video his mother made a secret between him and his mom, for now. "So um, I was thinking that maybe in the fall, I'd try out for the Ravens," Aiden took out the basketball he got for his birthday from his bag and tossed it to his father, "I was wondering if we could go to the Rivercourt and shoot around. Maybe you could give me a few pointers,"

"Yeah, I'd like that,"

"We could play a little one on one. I mean if you're not too old,"

Lucas laughed, "I may be your old man, but I still got game,"

The two Scotts stood up. A warm, gentle breeze blew around them.

Lucas stopped. The younger Scott looked up at his father.

"Mom?"

"Yeah," he smiled.

They knew she was there with them. They felt her love. She was there watching over them, just as she always had been.

* * *

**A/N: **I apologize for the lateness of this final chapter. I actually had Peyton's video written last January when I first started this fic because this was ultimately how I wanted to end it. But then I guess with school, life and other fics, I kinda put it on the back burner and eventually forgot about it. It wasn't until I read the last three reviews I got in my mailbox, did I remember and find the motivation to finally finish it off. 

Anyways, thanks to everyone who left a review and to anyone who is still reading this story. It is now complete :D And for those who read my other fics that I haven't updated in months either, I will be finishing them up because I hate leaving things unfinished, but it's a just a question of when…


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